Voices in the Leaves
by gena kumo
Summary: The personal accounts of ninjas...Where there should be no emotion...there is a blazing fire. Missing nins...forgotten friends...old age...unrequieted love...pain...just as human...as we all are. New Chapter for Asuma.
1. Expressionless

**Disclaimer: No, I do not own "Naruto" or any of the characters and do not claim to own it. That would be just ASKING for a file suit…and an extra angry Japanese lawyer. (but aren't lawyers usually that way? ;D) All ideas belong to fairycloud22, so please do not copy. Thanks.**

**Side note: I desperately need some reviews people!! comment please! Thank you :)**

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_They had waited so long for this. Once again they had caught up with him...after long travels and difficult tasks…but the reunion Sakura and Naruto had waited for seemed cold_…..._distant_…...

_The air hang thick with their anticipation as they tried to convince Sasuke to return and waited for his reply_…..._his answer…_

_**"What do you want me to say?" **He asked bluntly, with a flat, sarcastic edge to his voice._

"_**That 'I hate life and I wish everything was back to the way it was?'"** His gaze never made contact with theirs as he spoke._

"_**Cause I don't."**_

_…and it chilled them to the bone. _

_His eyes were dark, indifferent, unconcerned and uncaring, while Naruto's glowed with anger and Sakura's brimmed over with glistening tears._

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Sorry, all you Sasuke fans out there, but I have to admit…he has been an unfeeling jerk lately. (**SERIOUSLY**) I mean, just crashing through Naruto's kage bunshin like it was a puff of smoke, and abandoning everyone…(along with countless other things) Really!

When I thought of what characters from the leaf village would say (maybe in reality/real world) this was the first thing that popped into my head. It just sounds (to me) like Sasuke. It is interesting to imagine wat Sakura's and Naruto's reactions would be if Sasuke said this...after they had gone so far for him...

What **do** Sakura and Naruto want from Sasuke?

I don't think they even know...


	2. The One Exception

**Disclaimer: I do not own "Naruto" or these characters, but if I ****did****, in the wise words of another writer whose name I can't recall... "I'd be set for life!" :D All ideas belong to fairycloud22, so please, do not copy. Thanks**

**Side note: In all these quotes...If you just want to read their words...read the BOLD letters...:**

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_The Words of Jiraiya_

_A Dedication_

_In Remembrance of Two Great Shinobi_

_A Teacher and a Student_

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_The little homey kitchen was filled with a snowy sort of white light, sunlight streaming through the window, and laughter everywhere. _

_It was a place where you could talk with friends, whether sensei or student, and a place of rest, a port for weary travelers, especially for a wandering writer like Jiraiya. One minute here... then he was gone. _

_Maybe it was because of the little redheaded housewife that made this kitchen so inviting, her little touches and wooden framed pictures were on the walls, on the counters, everywhere. _

_But then again, it might have been the good-humored man that also lived in this house, the Yondaime, that brightened the atmosphere, quick to smile, quick to laugh, a yellow sun, (or flash in his case), of light. _

_Especially when he laughed, a full, but lighthearted sound...and his wife giggled along, her laughter sounding like tinkling bells as they joined his hearty guffaws._

_And it might have been the combination of the two, the blissfully happy, ever so young, couple. _

_Hearty chuckles echoed from the little room, coming from the white haired sensei at the table. He had not enjoyed himself this much in a long time, at least, not since the last time he visited. This was the first place he always came when he stopped by the leaf-village; he had told Minato so as they continued their conversation. _

_He was laughing because of something Minato had said…something that he found very amusing…the thought that Minato "could never think of a finer shinobi than…" Jiraiya. **V****ery**_ _amusing. **So he answered the young man that had once been his student with a chuckle, shaking his head, and saying…**_

_**"No, no, no…I've already told you. My book is a failure. Everything I **__**do**__** is a failure. **__**I'm**__** a failure…your just the only exception." **__He paused to disrespectfully ruffle the blond spiky hair of his friend, much to the annoyance of Minato, just like he had always done when this jounin had been a simple genin training under the old man. __Hokage or not, this "boy" would always be to him his young apprentice, and Jiraiya would always be his sensei…perhaps his "ero sennin"…either way..._

"_**But…" he continued. "that is only because you made your own luck, instead of leaning on a feeble old man for support…And as a ninja, if you can stand on you own, nothing stands in your way…you will be able to do anything! You will be invincible!" **Jiraiya grinned widely, and Minato smiled with his trademark ear-to-ear grin, eyes squinted, brimming with confidence, promise, and hope…_

Only to be lost…

_**A short year later…**_

_Jiraiya kneeled, hunched over in the rain, contemplating all of this. An old codger going through his departed memories…with a body…an painfully young body…lifeless before him. Why must the old die young? At least the pouring rain hid his mourning, his silent tears…_

"_**You will be invincible…" he mumbled, recalling his words to Minato.**__**"That is…until you sacrifice yourself for another…an entire village in your case, and I...a feeble old man, cannot save you…"**_

_A friend…and now a student. He could not save either of them. He was too weak…so very weak. The rain claimed his sobs and swallowed his grief stricken shout, leaving him in silence..._

_Except for…the cry…of a baby…surrounded by smothered wet candles with a seal on it's belly_…….._crying because it was alone…ever so alone…like the old sennin beside it…_

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"_PERVERT SENNIN!! WAKE UP ALREADY!!" Water exploded and showered on Jiraiya's face. _

"_Whaa…?!" Jiraiya shook himself awake, grabbing his head. He had gone off into daydreams…no…reminiscing the past again. He was __defiantly__ a grouchy old man now, taking naps in the middle of the day, remembering the "good old days…" though his past hadn't all been good…_

"_How will you know if I have improved if you don't even watch me?" His indignant yellow haired student stood hunched over in front of him, glaring at him through squinted eyes with both fists on his hips…quite like another impatient student of his…_

"_I just cleared the first stage." Now the boy gave a confident smirk, glowing with triumph._

"_What a brat…" Jiraiya muttered to himself, smirking. "What did you say…?" the boy questioned, looking at his sensei with suspicion. _

"_Nothing…Nothing…" Jiraiya rubbed his eyes and returned his attention to his student. "Well…let me see it again." _

_Confidently the young genin, called by a name especially familiar to Jiraiya… "Naruto"…took the water balloon in one hand, spinning the liquid inside. Using his left hand, he improvised the technique, bringing his hand again and again against the balloon, his movements becoming a blur, a flash of speed, and causing it to explode in his grasp. _

"_A very unusual…and somewhat brilliant way to do it…" Jiraiya thought, smiling quietly. "Reminds me of…"_

"_ALL-RIGHT!" Naruto yelped, pulling his fist down while cranking his arm downward in a silent "YESSS!" of victory. "SEE!? SEE!?"_

"_Yes." Jiraiya answered nonchalantly, but secretly he was glowing with inward pride for his student, smiling calmly. "In only two days…" He thought. "even less than Minato. Amazing…pretty darn amazing…"_

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All these almost forgotten memories filmed through Jiraiya's hazy vision, the light fading from his eyes and his grasp as blood trickled out of his mouth, and he smiled.

"**This must be what people call 'your life flashing before your eyes'"** He mused.

"**It makes me see everything a little bit more clearly…"** **Jiraiya closed his eyes, letting his thoughts wash over him.**

"**My many, many failures…"** He chuckled, coughing up more red liquid. "**And the one exception…"** The silence rang in his ears and the water, a peaceful sound.

"**And its result…"** One final rest claimed him. **"Uzumaki Naruto…the chosen child"** Seeing the familiar glowing face of his past student before his clouded eyes, he knew he was leaving this world…and going on…wherever that may be…

"**Thank you…"** He smiled as a firm hand took his, pulling him up out of the water into the coming light, and heard the familiar laugh that could only belong to the spiky yellow-haired vivid blue-eyed shinobi before him.

"**Minato." **Peace radiated from the faces of both shinobi as they greeted each other, after being separated for so long, and shafts of light shone around them. **"I am complete….."**


	3. Even If You Were Mine

Disclaimer: Nope. Don't own Naruto…or Kurenai…or Asuma. Surprise, surprise. (Thankfully. Kurenai probably would kill me if I did…8(...anyways, I don't have a thing for him…and women coming out of trees SCARE me!! 8( End of story.) All other ideas belong to fairycloud22, so please do not copy. Thanks.

_**These are Asuma's past thoughts and Kurenai's memories**_

_These are Kurenai's thoughts._

That being said…let's get on with this! :D

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"His Voice"

A Dedication to

A Nicotine-Addicted Chain-smoker (Who was loved in spite of it),

A Future Father,

And an Esteemed Sensei.

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The heat of summer saturated the air inside the apartment, leaving perspiration in beaded drops on the glass doors leading to the open balcony.

_**Darn this stinkin' air conditioner. (BAM) Has to break down RIGHT before I leave, doesn't it?**_

Shriveled grass and withered spring flowers swayed in the breeze sitting in their two wooden window boxes placed on either side of the sliding glass panels. Crooked nails stuck out at odd angles on their corners, clumsily holding the painted boards together and securing them to the wall. Each hammered in by large calloused hands, their owner cursing loudly at each missed strike, and sporting one black thumbnail.

_**And you can't fix it…in you condition and all.**_ She had glared daggers at him after that, but he had ignored her, looking on with a smile, eyes softening, and added… _**And with me being gone…**_ Then he had sat down beside her, putting one hand on her arm. _**Wish I could…**_

_But he couldn't have._ She shook her head slowly._ Duty…was one of the most important things in life to him and me. Duty to Konoha, to the hokage…to each other. We both knew what the risk was…_

Kurenai hadn't even attempted to revive the flowers, or the hanging plants. They hadn't been watered for weeks; she hadn't even thought about them. Things like that seemed insignificant right now, with the baby coming and…

The tears welled up, but she gave a long sniff to cut them off, inhaling the musty, humid air and sneezing loudly. She hadn't tried to fix the air conditioner either…but at least Shikamaru was coming over to do it today. One of the few smiles she had left to give stretched hesitantly at the corners of her mouth, as if she had forgotten how to smile at all.

_That boy…such a nice boy. I don't know what I…what we… _She looked down towards her swollen abdomen and gave it a pat. _Would have done without him. He's been such a help. Asuma would have been proud…_

Her concentration diverted to the comfortingly warm feeling in her body, indicating a tiny living infant bottled up inside of her, as Kurenai traced her swollen belly slowly with one finger for the thousandth time…

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"_**Don't just stare at my stomach like that!" Kurenai demanded authoritatively from her position on the couch as her husband hovered over her. "Say something to our baby!"**_

"_**And why should I do that?" Asuma asked, amused.**_

"_**Because…" she answered knowingly, "the baby can hear your voice, and it will recognize the sound when it is born."**_

_**A smirk graced his face, mouth bending upwards toward the left with a slight opening on the side and a crinkle at the corner, as if he still had his usual cigarette stuck in his teeth. But Kurenai didn't want their child to suffer from second-hand-smoke BEFORE it was even born, so absolutely NO nicotine in the house…at least none that Kurenai could see.**_

"_**So he'll know who his daddy is, Eh?" He mused, scratching at his stubble and grinning widely. You really couldn't argue with a dangerously pregnant woman. "O.K." **_

_**Leaning in with one hand against her abdomen, he muttered "Hellooo you little squirmin' thing." Kurenai laughed. **_

"_**Guess who I am?? Your smoking, cursing, bad-smelling father, that's who!" He chuckled softly. **_

"_**Will you mind if your daddy is like that, huh?" Resting his head down, he fondly rubbed Kurenai's round belly. "Not that you have a choice…" Kurenai gave him one piercing look, but he didn't notice, busy letting his hand graze her stomach lightly in circles, round and round, with his brown eyes crinkled closed, humming. **_

_**Suddenly the sound stopped, as he hand froze in place, head jerking up and eyes snapping open as Kurenai's double-banded scarlet red ones widened. **_

"_**The baby...it…" she stuttered, as he leaned his ear against her stomach and listened. **_

"_**Kicked!" He exclaimed, finishing her sentence as their eyes locked, and identical, knowing smiles appeared on their two faces.**_

"_**Guess he likes me after all…" He murmured, kissing her belly as she giggled.**_

"_**And who said it was going to be a boy…?" She questioned, eyebrow raised as she playfully glared down at him.**_

_**Both large shoulders gave a shrug as he said nonchalantly, "Just guessing…" swinging his pack over them, taking a moment to adjust the strap, and starting towards the door.**_

_**With a small wave over his head he called back, "I'm off on another mission! See you soon, honey!" and slowly began to trudge towards the large gates of Konoha in the distance. **_

_**Kurenai watched him go from the back door, waving back. "Good-bye!" Then she suddenly grasped her stomach, as the baby inside of her moved as well. She smirked down at her bulge, so big now that she could no longer see her feet, and whispered "Guess you're saying bye to your papa too…huh?"**_

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In grief, Kurenai plopped down heavily on the couch, biting her lip and trying hard to restrain the tears welling up, and the emotional "weakness" (as she saw it) that comes with pregnancy.

Taking one second to glance at the hand on her stomach, a tiny drop of water took the chance to trickle down her face as her chin quivered, the tears coming swiftly now, and she whispered to her little one,

"Guess you won't ever see your daddy's face…huh?" She sobbed quietly, rocking back and forth on the couch's lumpy cushion, wrapping her arms around herself and her unborn baby for what seemed a long time.

Finally resting her head wearily on the arm-rest to the side, her dark, tear-dampened hair fanned out against it. The couch and her clothes were wet with salt water, her eyes red and puffy from crying.

Looking into the sunlight through the dusty air, she took her happy memories one by one into her heart, and found a little spark of hope in the solemn darkness of being an expecting mother, all alone. A lone figure was approaching the house in the distance.

"**But you heard his voice…" **

She whispered comfortingly to her little one as a young man with a spiky pony-tail climbed the steps to his sensei's old apartment, finding enough strength in herself and the boy for the both of them.

Asuma had not left her completely alone, even in his death.

Wiping away a tear she sat up, ready to greet Shikamaru, smiling sadly.

"**And that is something…" **

Walking in the door Shikamaru gave a small grunt in greeting, and began to work steadily on the broken air-conditioning unit in the corner, Kurenai silently giving her thanks in a smile.

_Asuma, I haven't forgotten you. You have affected so many around you, your fellow shinobi, genin and chunnin alike, especially your students._

She looked fondly on her husband's closest pupil, his Shogui partner, the boy with the brains and a knack for beating Asuma at his favorite game. He was so fiercely loyal to his sensei that he cared enough to do these little things for Kurenai in his memory, and for his child. Shikamaru had sworn he would protect Asuma's child with his life, and Kurenai believed him.

_I know he hasn't forgotten you._

Determination flickered steadily in her eyes.

_And we never will…_

Her smile widened as Shikamaru stubbed he thumb accidentally with a wild swing of a wrench, and cursed profusely, reminding her a little of Asuma.

_I promise._

**A Dedication to ****Sarutobi**** Asuma…**

**He shall not be forgotten.**


	4. His Voice

Disclaimer: Nope. Don't own Naruto…or Kurenai…or Asuma. Surprise, surprise. (Thankfully. Kurenai probably would kill me if I did…8(...anyways, I don't have a thing for him…and women coming out of trees SCARE me!! 8( End of story.) All other ideas belong to fairycloud22, so please do not copy. Thanks.

_**These are Asuma's past thoughts and Kurenai's memories**_

_These are Kurenai's thoughts._

That being said…let's get on with this! :D

xxx

"His Voice"

A Dedication to

A Nicotine-Addicted Chain-smoker (Who was loved in spite of it),

A Future Father,

And an Esteemed Sensei.

xxx

The heat of summer saturated the air inside the apartment, leaving perspiration in beaded drops on the glass doors leading to the open balcony.

_**Darn this stinkin' air conditioner. (BAM) Has to break down RIGHT before I leave, doesn't it?**_

Shriveled grass and withered spring flowers swayed in the breeze, sitting in their two wooden window boxes placed on either side of the sliding glass panels. Crooked nails stuck out at odd angles on their corners, clumsily holding the painted boards together and securing them to the wall. Each hammered in by large calloused hands, their owner cursing loudly at each missed strike, and sporting one black thumbnail.

_**And you can't fix it…in you condition and all.**_ She had glared daggers at him after that, but he had ignored her, looking on with a smile, eyes softening, and added… _**And with me being gone…**_ Then he had sat down beside her, putting one hand on her arm. _**Wish I could…**_

_But he couldn't have._ She shook her head slowly._ Duty…was one of the most important things in life to him and me. Duty to Konoha, to the hokage…to each other. We both knew what the risk was…_

Kurenai hadn't even attempted to revive the flowers, or the hanging plants. They hadn't been watered for weeks; she hadn't even thought about them. Things like that seemed insignificant right now, with the baby coming and…

The tears welled up, but she gave a long sniff to cut them off, inhaling the musty, humid air and sneezing loudly. She hadn't tried to fix the air conditioner either…but at least Shikamaru was coming over to do it today. One of the few smiles she had left to give stretched hesitantly at the corners of her mouth, as if she had forgotten how to smile at all.

_That boy…such a nice boy. I don't know what I…what we… _She looked down towards her swollen abdomen and gave it a pat. _Would have done without him. He's been such a help. Asuma would have been proud…_

Her concentration diverted to the comfortingly warm feeling in her body, indicating a tiny living infant bottled up inside of her, as Kurenai traced her swollen belly slowly with her finger for the thousandth time…

xxx

"_**Don't just stare at my stomach like that!" Kurenai demanded authoritatively from her position on the couch as her husband hovered over her. "Say something to our baby!"**_

"_**And why should I do that?" Asuma asked, amused.**_

"_**Because…" she answered knowingly, "the baby can hear your voice, and it will recognize the sound when it is born."**_

_**A smirk graced his face, mouth bending upwards toward the left with a slight opening on the side and a crinkle at the corner, as if he still had his usual cigarette stuck in his teeth. But Kurenai didn't want their child to suffer from second-hand-smoke BEFORE it was even born, so absolutely NO nicotine in the house…at least none that Kurenai could see.**_

"_**So he'll know who his daddy is, Eh?" He mused, scratching at his stubble and grinning widely. You really couldn't argue with a dangerously pregnant woman. "O.K." **_

_**Leaning in with one hand against her abdomen, he muttered "Hellooo you little squirmin' thing." Kurenai laughed. **_

"_**Guess who I am?? Your smoking, cursing, bad-smelling father, that's who!" He chuckled softly. **_

"_**Will you mind if your daddy is like that, huh?" Resting his head down, he fondly rubbed Kurenai's round belly. "Not that you have a choice…" Kurenai gave him one piercing look, but he didn't notice, busy letting his hand graze her stomach lightly in circles, round and round, with his brown eyes crinkled closed, humming. **_

_**Suddenly the sound stopped, as he hand froze in place, head jerking up and eyes snapping open as Kurenai's double-banded scarlet ones widened. **_

"_**The baby...it…" she stuttered, as he leaned his ear against her stomach and listened. **_

"_**Kicked!" He exclaimed, finishing her sentence as their eyes locked, and identical, knowing smiles appeared on their two faces.**_

"_**Guess he likes me after all…" He murmured, kissing her belly as she giggled.**_

"_**And who said it was going to be a boy…?" She questioned, eyebrow raised as she playfully glared down at him.**_

_**Both large shoulders gave a shrug as he said nonchalantly, "Just guessing…" swinging his pack over them, taking a moment to adjust the strap, and starting towards the door.**_

_**With a small wave over his head he called back, "I'm off on another mission! See you soon, honey!" and slowly began to trudge towards the large gates of Konoha in the distance. **_

_**Kurenai watched him go from the back door, waving back. "Good-bye!" Then she suddenly grasped her stomach, as the baby inside of her moved as well. She smirked down at her bulge, so big now that she could no longer see her feet, and whispered "Guess you're saying bye to your papa too…huh?"**_

xxx

In grief, Kurenai plopped down heavily on the couch, biting her lip and trying hard to restrain the tears welling up, and the emotional "weakness" (as she saw it) that comes with pregnancy.

Taking one second to glance at the hand on her stomach, a tiny drop of water took the chance to trickle down her face as her chin quivered, the tears coming swiftly now, and she whispered to her little one,

"Guess you won't ever see your daddy's face…huh?" She sobbed quietly, rocking back and forth on the couch's lumpy cushion, wrapping her arms around herself and her unborn baby for what seemed a long time.

Finally resting her head wearily on the arm-rest to the side, her dark, tear-dampened hair fanned out against it. The couch and her clothes were wet with salt water, her eyes red and puffy from crying.

Looking into the sunlight through the dusty air, she took her happy memories one by one into her heart, and found a little spark of hope in the solemn darkness of being an expecting mother, all alone. A lone figure was approaching the house in the distance.

"**But you heard his voice…" **

She whispered comfortingly to her little one as a young man with a spiky pony-tail climbed the steps to his sensei's old apartment, finding enough strength in herself and the boy for the both of them.

Asuma had not left her completely alone, even in his death.

Wiping away a tear she sat up, ready to greet Shikamaru, smiling sadly.

"**And that is something…" **

Walking in the door Shikamaru gave a small grunt in greeting, and began to work steadily on the broken air-conditioning unit in the corner, Kurenai silently giving her thanks in a smile.

_Asuma, I haven't forgotten you. You have affected so many around you, your fellow shinobi, genin and chunnin alike, especially your students._

She looked fondly on her husband's closest pupil, his Shogui partner. The boy with the brains and a knack for beating Asuma at his favorite game. He was so fiercely loyal to his sensei that he cared enough to do these little things for Kurenai in his memory, and for his child. Shikamaru had sworn he would protect Asuma's child with his life, and Kurenai believed him.

_I know he hasn't forgotten you._

Determination flickered steadily in her eyes.

_And we never will…_

Her smile widened as Shikamaru stubbed his thumb accidentally with a wild swing of a wrench, and cursed profusely, reminding her a little of Asuma.

_I promise._

**A Dedication to ****Sarutobi**** Asuma…**

**He shall not be forgotten.**


End file.
